the ph(r)ase

On one of the chilliest winter night, while returning to his flat, Rajat got a call from his old school friend, Sunny who told him about his engagement with his girl friend.  He thanked Rajat because of whom the couple met some 3years ago. The two old friends talked for about an hour or so. It was quite late, next day being a Saturday, Rajat thought of watching some movie. He took out some old DVDs of animated movies, but somehow picked one of his all time favorite romantic movie, PS I Love You. He went to the kitchen to get some snacks and then played the disc. While the DVD player took time to load the disc, he stared at the cover of the disc. The title made him nostalgic as the phrase had a lot in particular with his life.

He dived into the memory lane which took him into his engineering times. It was his last year as a teenager and like all others; he wanted to get the most out of it. It’s not as if that was supposed to be the end of his fun times but then he would enter his twenties, meaning to be a lil more sane. But saneness came pretty soon to him and in form of something which he din’t think of in his wild imaginations. As a young lad, he never believed in so called love and always thought of it as something that would never cross his way. But then there was something that was destined for him and it came in the form of a girl who lived across his home. There was something in her which caught his attention. For the initial period, he thought that it was an infatuation. Later, he became so much engrossed with her that his life changed dramatically. He now started relating to typical bollywood romantic numbers, liked solitude, talked randomly for hours with ‘her’, talked non-sense most of the times, etc. The infatuation became more and more intense and it gripped him so much that now he started observing her daily routine; the time she wakes up in the morning and come outside her house, the time she worships the tulsi plant, the time she leaves for her college, when she comes back and the list continued.

He was dying to talk to her but there was no way out. Then one fine day, he mustered courage and called at her home. Luckily, she was the one who picked up. He blurted out everything on the first go and made his intentions very clear of befriending her.

Though at start she was reluctant but on constant pursuance, she decided that it would be only talks, may be on phone or chat and nothing else. For him, it was more than enough as he could atleast talk to someone he liked the most. While the frequency of talks increased with time, she became a good friend; atleast he believed that. Memories were afresh once again. He remembered how he used to call her and they used to talk at length. Discussing good and the bad times, laughing, mocking others around them but then it was never the same. The movie once again reminded him of the patience, the love, the dedication; the two souls in love had. Even after one of them died, the other kept on waiting and kept the love alive in Memories. He too had the same feeling for that girl to the fact that he didn’t think for anyone else for so many years though she never asked so and it was all one sided affair. And he always vied for saying this phrase to her and he did multiple times but she was unmoved. She was more of a practical girl who din’t believe in all this; he on the other hand, believed that one day she would.

It was almost 6 months he had last talked with her and that too when she wished him on his b’day. He searched her number on phone but then there was something which bothered him from inside. He stopped himself from dialing the number though it was right on his mobile screen. It was also very late and he had no reason to call her at this time. Their present relationship had many constraints and from starting it was based on some rules and regulations which were set by her. He decided to call her in the morning and with a light smile; went to sleep.

Almost a fortnight passed since that night and he almost forgot to call her. But then the day came when he finally decided to call her. He dialed the number but it didn’t connect. It seemed that she has changed the number but she dint ever bother to tell him. He had been talking on phone with her since last so many years, there were occasional fights over certain things and then for couple of months, no talks. But he used to break the ice by calling her again and rhyming his words with Sorry, and even that made him felt good. He went to terrace and with a sudden breeze, a sense of realization occurred to him that this is the longest time they had not talked since the day he approached her for the first time; almost 7 months. Owing to his very busy schedule, he didn’t get time to call. But she could have called him or atleast could have sent a simple message to say Hi!! Why can’t she break the ice for once?  It slowly occurred to him that off-late she used to call him only when she required something or the other done. He loved her once so he dint give much heed to these thoughts but still he had his concerns over her inconsistent behavior. Rajat was still on a dilemma whether he should call her or rather wait for some more time to check whether she is concerned for him or not. He was not sure about the duration of this wait but this time he was ready to take his chances.